Asheville News

The Monday dailies

Jason Sandford July 12, 2005

Jason Sandford

Jason Sandford is a reporter, writer, blogger and photographer interested in all things Asheville.

Mary and the bats

Did you guys see that weird story yesterday that Mary Juddliquor did about the bathouse in Rutherford County? I didn’t quite get it.

There’s a family living in a house full of bats, Mary tells us. The family has been bitten numerous times, family members tell Mary, pointing to dots on their fleshy, fishbelly white arms. Family members are getting rabies shots, Mary tells us.

Finally, Mary tells us that the family is planning to move out because state wildlife officials or somebody says the bats can’t be moved because it’s mating season.

What??? Show me that law, Mary. Seriously. I want the exact state statutue. That just sounds ridiculous. I guess it’s the family that’s getting fucked, not the bats.

Breaking news: Woodfin renamed ‘Poopytown’

The WLOSers reported as news yesterday that Woodfin smells like poopy. Well no shit. I could have told you that.

Actually, the news said that residents had been complaining of an even worse-than-usual smell emanating from the MSD sewerage treatment plant in Woodfin.

The cause of the smell? The MSD boys told the news that they had to shut down some “treatment units” to clean the shit out of them, and that is leading to the odor. All the clouds and rain might have helped contribute to the lingering P-U smell, the MSD boys said. Good answer! Yes, blame it on the rain.

Look, if you move to Woodfin, you know what you’re getting. Suck up and deal.

Jason Sandford

Jason Sandford is a reporter, writer, blogger and photographer interested in all things Asheville.

South Ashvegas diet

Petition: Bring Back Bettes

2 Comments

Bulldog July 13, 2005

… Or, the family can just hang out on the porch (it looked like there was plenty of furniture already there) and wait for one of the bats to roll over on his back and light up a Marlboro and say, “Hey, baby, get me a beer, wouldya?” Then they’ll know the bat mating season is over in Rutherford County.

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Bulldog July 12, 2005

I’m with you on the story about the bats. Unless the family was living in a protected species cave (the house may have been close to that, but it did appear to be above ground) there’s no way in hell the state can tell you you cannot exterminate rodents – the flying kind or otherwise. How much trouble would it be for the reporter to contact a state official and, if what the family contends is true, get his bureaucratic face on TV explaining it.
Sorry, I forgot. They only had 30 seconds for the story so they could piss away 45 seconds with happy talk.

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