Tales from Urgent Care

Jason Sandford

Jason Sandford is a reporter, writer, blogger and photographer interested in all things Asheville.

1

Dog bite
A 20-something guy walks in, a pretty girlfriend with him. His left hand is freshly bandaged. He gets the same line the receptionist greets everyone with: “Sick visit, or work-related?”

Nobody can seem to understand the receptionist, so she repeats. He says “sick.” The receptionist delivers the next rehearsed lines. “Fill this out. Picture I.D. and insurance card.”

The young man grabs a pen and starts to read over the forms. He says he doesn’t have insurance. A debate ensues between the man and the receptionist. The pretty girlfriend listens compassionately. The man asks if there’s anything that can be done, because he was walking his dog this morning and the neighbour’s dog and his dog got into it and he tried to break them up and he got bit. Animal control came out and settled things, but urged him to have the dog bite treated. This can be quite a traumatising incident to go through regardless of whether you like dogs or not. Some animals can be unpredictable. If you or anyone you know has suffered from a dog bite accident, it would help to get in touch with a Personal Injury lawyer so you can take this further and see whether you can get any compensation from what happened. This isn’t your fault, so you shouldn’t feel like you have to suffer in silence. The man’s getting upset. This incident could have ended badly if the person who was bitten had been a child, those who find themselves dealing with dog bites may want to seek legal advice from a law firm similar to Quirk Law Group who may be able to support them with their case.

The receptionist said the man could fill out a “compassionate care” form to see if he can qualify for aid. But the man says no. “I can’t do that,” he says. He says he has no money. The receptionist is firm, saying she’s just trying to help, to explain his options.

The man finally walks out, his pretty girlfriend trailing behind him. Some would argue that he should have gotten in touch with a lawyer, who might have been able to help him with getting compensation since it was not his fault.

Chopper
A round woman with a “West Coast Choppers” T-shirt strides in, carrying a small waste basket with a plastic bag inside it, like she’s ready to vomit any minute. She’s pale. She’s gruff with the receptionist, who delivers the same lines.

She fills out the paperwork, hands it in. Her mother, carrying a sweet little dark-haired baby girl, walks in. The child looks healthy, but people are coughing all around. That doesn’t seem to worry them. The receptionist calls the motorcycle mama over, and says she has an outstanding balance from a previous visit that requires payment. The woman immediately balks and walks out.

Hurting all over
A short woman with a flabby belly that hangs low sits to have her blood pressure taken. She says her arm, leg and back have all been bothering her, swollen and rashy.

“Take anything daily?” the nurse asks the short woman, who starts reciting: “Lipitor. Xanax. A blood pressure pill – I don’t know the name of it. Singuliar.” There may have been one or two others. “Are you allergic to anything?” The woman says, “I know I’m allergic to oxycodone, that’s for sure.”

I’m in recovery
An older, well-spoken woman sits in the chair. The nurse asks her what’s wrong.

“I was getting out of the shower and slipped. My feet went right out from under me on the tile and I pitched forward, and my head hit the side of the door with all my weight. I couldn’t get in to see my regular doctor, but a nurse there said I required stitches and a head X-ray.” She says she wasn’t knocked out, but that she feels a little spacy, but that could just be because of stress.

The woman finds the gash in her head, a 2.5-centimeter wide gash that’s not closing. They’ll use staples. “Will you have to shave my head at all?” No is the answer, and she’s relieved.

When the nurse asks her about what drugs she takes and if she’s allergic, the woman notes that she doesn’t want any painkillers administered. “I’m in recovery.”

As the nurse begins her work, she asks a couple of required questions when someone has suffered a head injury. “What year is it?” The woman answers correctly.

“Who is president?” The woman chuckles a little ruefully. “Well, unfortunately, it’s that little Bushy man.”

Idle chatter
As patients are seen, the doctor on duty and the nurses all have a running patter and get together to talk about some of what they’ve seen so far.

There was a short discussion of a fairly severe laceration. “Luckily, it didn’t hit the radial artery.” There are some laughs about a boy who had a mass of tissue bulging around his testicles. Not laughs at the boys expense, just nervous laughs about having to deal with a dicey situation that was clearly embarrassing to the boy. They had seen several cases of strep.

There’s a lot of talk about lunch. Nobody can pronounce “schezwan,” but they decide to order Chinese. One guy says he’s having General Tsao’s chicken.