Jason Sandford
Jason Sandford is a reporter, writer, blogger and photographer interested in all things Asheville.
The words “Teaser shot!” or something to that effect hit us at the start of the local news on Friday as we saw a shot of “Tallahassee” Tammy Watford and Pat “Simple” Simon strolling the streets of Hendersonville for the annual North Carolina Apple Festival. On to the news…
Speaking of apples
Holly Headache told us that a lot of people have been concerned about this year’s apple crop in the wake of the Easter freeze and the summer drought. But the golds, galas and romes are coming in, she said. She quoted a festival organizer who said they expect a quarter of a million people to visit the festival over the Labor Day weekend. Holly cut to a nothing story by Tammy, who worked in cuteness like talking to us while actually peeling an apple, then saying something about how the festival is “so appealing.” Ha. Ha. Ha. She also said something about local businesses getting “a slice” of the profits. Ha.
Sheraldo delivered the most informative report – real information we could use, though Sheraldo was required to deliver his report while holding an apple, and he took a big bite at the end.
But in between, Sheraldo said all the hot weather has actually made some apples sweeter than ever. People love a snappy, crisp apple, and that’s what they’ll get, he said. He showed us an apple farmer who tested an apple. First, the farmer sprayed it with a chemical that reveals the appeals maturity and starch content. Then the farmer squeezed juice from a freshly sliced apple onto a refractometer, which uses sunlight to determine sugar content. The farmer said that for the gala variety, local apples are at 15, 16 or 17 percent sugar, which is incredible.
Good work Sheraldo.
Tammy and Pat had to bring it all back down by interviewing a Barney impersonator, who sniffed and showed us his single bullet, then hugged Tammy. Yuck.
From there, the news took a big downturn. You could tell because the amount of celebrity news increased sharply. We learned that OJ Simpson’s book about the murders of his wife and her friend will actually be sold in stores. We learned that one-time Charlie Manson follower Leslie Van Houten’s request for parole was denied again for the 18th time. And we learned that everybody still loves Princess Diana, even on the occasion of the 10th anniversary of her death.
In other news, John Le told us about a Madison County woman from Mars Hill who had more than 665,000 miles on her 1989 Ford GT.
Shirley Fender and the miracle miles on her car are featured on the Ford web site. Shirley said she thinks the car is special because she prayed three months straight for a car, then received it. She travels all over selling vaccuum cleaners. She said the car’s never left her stranded.
In still other news, there was a fight at the Swannanoa Valley Youth Detention Center. About 10 kids were pepper-sprayed and three employees had to go to the hospital for injuries. Another Haywood County development has big-time erosion problems. And we saw a real promo for the new 10 p.m. news on WMYA, channel 9 on Charter cable. The show will be anchored by Holly and newcomer Frank Fraboni.
