Allegations of rape bring disharmony to West Asheville arts group at The Landing

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UPDATE: Folks at The Landing have followed up with this apology:

We offer our apologies to the community. We never thought of ourselves as taking matters into our own hands; we thought we were holding space for the affected parties to take whatever action they deemed necessary. Faced with vastly conflicting stories we very honestly felt that we were handling the situation with compassion and understanding for all involved, however we realize that we were simply in over our heads. We thank those of you who wisely and rationally have advised us to leave this matter to the authorities and the counselors at Our Voice.

We will also be hosting a workshop about sexual consent and wish to invite the community at large to participate. We at the Landing have never taken this lightly or blindly taken sides or sought to keep anyone from interacting with professionals or law enforcement. We have a deep sadness about all of this and impartially hope for truth, justice, and healing in this matter.

Each member of the Landing has her or his own unique perspective and opinion on this matter but as much as we are capable of making a unified statement this is what we have to present at this time. Thank you.

Original post, April 11: Allegations of rape made about a member of The Landing, an underground circus, communal arts space free-for-all in West Asheville, have roiled the group. So much so that The Landing posted a long explanation of the events on its Facebook page. Interesting that the group felt it necessary to go public in this way. Here’s the post:

Dear friends of The Landing,
In recent days, a highly charged allegation has been made about a member of The Landing, as well as the community at large regarding an incident that took place there last week.

Specifically, it has been claimed that a resident of The Landing sexually assaulted a woman who was involved with him in a circus troupe that rehearses there.

Furthermore, the person making these claims publicly (who is not the alleged victim) has stated repeatedly on Facebook that members of The Landing and the circus troupe covered up the alleged assault and have urged the woman not to file a complaint with the police.

It is worth noting that the individual who posted these things has done so without any direct knowledge of the events that took place, and his account does not align with that of the woman he claims to be defending.

We would like to set the record straight. Out of respect for the privacy of the individuals involved, we will not name names, nor comment at this time on the specific details of what initially transpired. However, gross mischaracterizations of people at The Landing have been made, and we would like to take a moment to answer them.

The incident in question took place on Thursday, April 4. Some members of the community, and specifically the circus troupe, were first informed of the allegations the following Sunday. At that time, several members of the troupe (some of whom are also Landing residents) met with both parties, to hear their respective versions of the story, as well as interviewing other witnesses. It is important to us that these claims be taken seriously so that we can ensure that everyone who comes to The Landing may feel safe and know that their personal boundaries will be respected.

After hearing the woman’s story, members of the group that were mediating on behalf of the community encouraged her to see a professional councilor who specializes in such situations before consulting with police. This was not done to protect the man involved, but because the description of events that she related at that time did not indicate that the incident warranted police action. Nonetheless, it was communicated to her that the community supports her decision to take any action she deems appropriate.

Contrary to claims made on Facebook, she was not encouraged to “meditate and do yoga” with the man she felt violated her. Rather, each of them was questioned about his or her experience separately (and not informed of what the other party was saying). We offered to host a mediated conversation in which the woman could explain her version of events to the man, but she ultimately decided that she did not want to do so. Meanwhile, he has been suspended from the circus, pending results of the investigation.

It is clear that there are two versions of the story that vary on a number of important points. However both accounts present a much more complicated story than the Facebook poster claims. When telling their stories to the Landing representatives, neither party indicated that the situation was a clear-cut “rape,” as much as a sexual encounter in which boundaries may not have been clearly communicated.

As a community, we have discussed the details of this story at great length, trying to understand what happened. It is a highly charged issue. On the one hand, the resident who is being accused is a dear friend to many of us, who has never in the past exhibited behavior of the kind being alleged, and who seemed genuinely horrified that the woman had experienced trauma around their interaction. On the other hand, we are all aware of the prevalence of sexual assaults in our society and understand that it is absolutely crucial to take such accusations seriously, especially given that it is rare (though not unheard of) for someone to make a false accusation of rape.

It is important to note that the most damning accusations are coming not from the woman involved, but from a third party who is estranged from her, and who appears to have an agenda of his own. Meanwhile, others are quoting this secondhand information and extrapolating from it with very few facts on which to base their speculation.

We are continuing to investigate the situation, a process that is going on independent of any other police investigation that may or may not be happening. In the meantime, we as a community will reserve judgment, and we would urge others to do so as well. While sexual assault is a horrendous crime that must be prevented at all cost, it is also important to realize that falsely accusing a person of such a crime is something that can have devastating effects on their reputation, career, family, and mental health. It is unfair to take such accusations lightly or to rush to judgment without gathering all the facts and testimony available.

Finally, please know that any claim that we would ever willingly harbor someone we know to be a rapist is unfounded. The Landing is a community of about two dozen people of diverse backgrounds and a fairly even gender mix. Among us are people who have experienced sexual assault, and we realize the complications and intensity of such a situation.

We are taking measured steps to uncover the full story to the best of our ability, and to listen to both sides with patience and care. Both parties are good friends to many of us, and as a community we are trying to support both of them in growing and healing from the rift this experience has created in their lives. In the meantime, we are beginning a dialogue about how to promote awareness around issues of sexual consent, so as to hopefully avoid any future situations like this. We will keep you posted as this dialogue evolves, and will be making a more comprehensive statement once we have more of the facts about this incident.

 

27 Comments

Markov April 24, 2013 - 8:46 pm

“we came to realize that it was poorly worded and gave a strong impression of impartiality that we didn’t actually mean to convey.”

Wrong. It was NOT ‘poorly’ worded. It was rather well written actually. What you didn’t mean to convey was your true colors. It is fairly obvious that this response was written as a desperate attempt to control massive damage being done to this image you are trying to uphold as some kind of self-sustaining commune of enlightened beings. I’m sorry but there comes a time when you must realize that you, just like everyone else, are not immune to the ugly parts of humanity. Because you are human. Quit pretending to be something more by ignoring the dark truth. Someone has been hurt and deserves to be listened to by people who can DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.

Big Al April 26, 2013 - 10:33 pm

Totally agree. Pure spin-zone, damage-control, CYA.

Andor April 22, 2013 - 8:10 pm

Hi everyone. I’m a member of The Landing and was involved in writing the statement above. In the week after it was posted, we got a lot of angry feedback about it, and we came to realize that it was poorly worded and gave a strong impression of impartiality that we didn’t actually mean to convey. The current statement was deleted from our Facebook page about a week ago and replaced with the following:
“We offer our apologies to the community. We never thought of ourselves as taking matters into our own hands; we thought we were holding space for the affected parties to take whatever action they deemed necessary. Faced with vastly conflicting stories we very honestly felt that we were handling the situation with compassion and understanding for all involved, however we realize that we were simply in over our heads. We thank those of you who wisely and rationally have advised us to leave this matter to the authorities and the counselors at Our Voice.
We will also be hosting a workshop about sexual consent and wish to invite the community at large to participate. We at the Landing have never taken this lightly or blindly taken sides or sought to keep anyone from interacting with professionals or law enforcement. We have a deep sadness about all of this and impartially hope for truth, justice, and healing in this matter.
Each member of the Landing has her or his own unique perspective and opinion on this matter but as much as we are capable of making a unified statement this is what we have to present at this time. Thank you.”

Simmer April 17, 2013 - 9:20 pm
Grrr April 15, 2013 - 5:50 pm

So, it’s a minor point but I’m gonna make it anyway–the title of the piece is “Rape allegations bring disharmony…etc” When it may be better phrased as “Alleged rape brings disharmony…”.

Point being, syntactically speaking, the victim is not the source of the disharmony. The alleged rapist is. I feel like it’s worth saying, as victim-blaming people often try to make into a “you’re tearing the community apart! how can you do this?” sort of scenario in situations like this.

meh March 15, 2015 - 10:06 am

Agreed – thank you for pointing this out!!

David Stuart April 14, 2013 - 11:17 pm

There is only one response that might be acceptable from The Community:
“If you feel you were assaulted, you should 1) go to the hospital if you were injured, and 2) call APD – here’s their number.”

Yeppers April 15, 2013 - 5:44 pm

Seriously. This shit is unbelievable.

Curious April 14, 2013 - 10:26 pm

I think most of you making comments are either missing a key point, or I am misunderstanding something.
In the statement from the landing, it appears that the accusations are coming from a third party, not the alleged victim. That makes a big difference to me.

That said, if the girl feels she was raped, sexually assaulted, attacked, or anything she should seek legal recourse and councilling imediatly.

If it is only a third party making these claims I see no fault in the way The Landing is handling this situation and preceding.

Just my two cents.

Marissa April 18, 2013 - 11:39 am

The “third party” only made this information public. It seems to be the Landing who is trying to act like judge and jury and perhaps even discouraging the woman from taking further action. The act happened, and it is not the role of the commune to try to convince ANYONE to deal with this within it.

Big Al April 14, 2013 - 1:57 pm

This “community”, and the circus within, both sound like cults where forces of personality and ego trump individual free will.

Al April 26, 2013 - 1:39 am

Have you ever even been there?

Sarah April 14, 2013 - 9:24 am

“Clear-cut rape”! Is that the same as “legitimate rape”? Absolutely disgusting.

John April 13, 2013 - 7:50 am

“Basically, we told her to read the Ethical Slut and take a Xanax.”

This was a trainwreck waiting to happen. I have heard numerous times of girls getting shopped around to the patriarchs at the landing. The whole place is gross.

Al April 26, 2013 - 1:37 am

Oh boy, hearsay on the internet! It MUST be true. You sir, obviously have no idea what or of whom you are talking about.

Clint April 12, 2013 - 5:53 pm

The statement from The Landing seems to me to be surprisingly eloquent, intelligent and objective. Is it really so contemptible for a community to get a handle on its own problems before rushing to call the police? We all know next to nothing about what happened. Most of you seem to be assuming that the alleged perpetrator is guilty of the assault, when you have basically no knowledge of any facts surrounding the issue. (I know this is the internet, where people spout off all day about matters of which they have little knowledge.)
My first thought was that, if this is some kind of ersatz commune, then there is probably no shortage of psychedelic drugs, which can lead to all kinds of misunderstandings in interpersonal interactions. If that’s the case, then it would absolutely make sense to investigate the matter thoroughly before calling the police. Even if that’s not the case, not rushing to judgment still seems like a good idea.
I understand that there may be a tendency to “blame the victim” in too many cases of sexual assault, but as a male it’s a bit scary to see such a vehement reaction to what is only an accusation involving two people we don’t even know. It’s basically an opposite reaction to “blaming the victim”.
The writer of the statement notes that the gender make-up of the group is balanced, and that some of the members are survivors of sexual assault. He says that the women in the group advised the alleged victim to meet with an appropriate counselor because what she described did not seem to warrant police involvement. Have a little faith in the ability of your fellow women to protect each other.

Smytty April 13, 2013 - 11:59 am

Is it really so contemptible for a community to get a handle on its own problems before rushing to call the police?

Yes.

Scott April 13, 2013 - 6:23 pm

Bullshit. If there’s an alleged sexual assault, you call the police to investigate. You don’t rely on a commune of circus clowns.

indie April 15, 2013 - 11:07 am

LOL.

Big Al April 19, 2013 - 10:54 am

Well said, Sir!

Danny Possible April 12, 2013 - 2:16 pm

Please listen to and believe the survivor. Please be focused on the needs of the survivor. I know its tough when the perpetrator is someone close to us, someone we know and love but it does everyone a disservice when you trivialize a survivor’s experiences. The perpetrator learns nothing of accountability, the survivor is alienated and shamed, and a community becomes complicit in a crime further contributing to a rape culture of victim blaming. Don’t do that, please do not handle this in such a sadly typical way. Support the survivor, be the support network she needs to have an empowering healing process. Hold the perpetrator accountable in as much as you are able wherever he is unable to himself.

Scott April 12, 2013 - 12:32 pm

Please tell me APD has been contacted.

Carrie April 12, 2013 - 11:42 am

It is amazing to me that this group claims to “support both of them” when what they are doing is the most egregious form of public victim shaming that I have ever witnessed.

Who in their right mind would think that “hosting a mediated conversation between both of them” would be a rational idea. Gee, I can’t imagine why she declined!

And also what is a “clear-cut rape?”

Making note twice to false rape accusations (which account for less than 2% of all reports) is basically saying that “we love this guy and think the girl just misunderstood what was happening.” Yes, because I am sure she would go through ALL of this just to put this man through the ringer.

While you claim to respect the privacy of the individuals (you are so nice to not name names)you seem more concerned with what the public may think of “The Landing.” Heaven forbid our troupe gets a bad name. If you cared about the privacy of anyone you would have not made this public statement!

Please leave the investigation up to the professionals (who I am pretty sure don’t sit down accuser in the same room with the accused to “talk things out”) and worry more about the people in your troupe/commune/whatever and less about what the public is (rightly or wrongly) saying about you.

For shame.

Murphy April 12, 2013 - 10:53 am

I thought there was an ordinance that prevents large numbers of folks who are not related from living together communally in a large home – how many people are “residents” of this place?

Grrrr April 12, 2013 - 10:11 am

“The description of events that she related at that time did not indicate that the incident warranted police action.” Oh really??? Legal experts are we? WTF is that? Just…no.

Just so everyone knows, “mediation” between the accuser and the accused never needs to happen in a situation where sexual violence is alleged. Again, just…no. Wow. Huge ethical issues there…The concept of mediation in cases of rape or domestic violence is completely inappropriate. And even so, “mediators” don’t discourage or encourage any type of legal action or non action. For god’s sakes. It is essential the mediators are neutral. Really, I’m sure intentions have been good but the above statement is not ok for so many reasons.

These people seem more upset about the “gross mischaracterizations of people at The Landing” than about the fact that there was most likely a sexual assault in their community. I really hope that is not the case.

I hope this woman gets some support from people who are not invested in any particular outcome and who have nothing to lose either way. I hope the community also gets support and clarity around appropriate roles and can work together to create a safer space.

The one statement I agree with wholeheartedly is that the community needs to dialogue around issues of consent. Clearly there have been some missteps here.

PlasticPaddy April 12, 2013 - 8:37 am

Jim Jones would approve of your investigation methods.

Scott April 11, 2013 - 8:37 pm

Cool. Apparently the Landing has its own law enforcement and CID unit.

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