America’s next top model – NOT from Brevard

No potential.

That was the bottom line for our local girl, 20-year-old Kathy Hoxit, who was competing on the newest season (six) of UPN’s America’s Next Top Model. Kathy, of Brevard, earned the distinction Wednesday night of being the first model-wannabee to get drop-kicked off the show. Now 12 stick figures remain.

I don’t know why everyone makes such a big deal about this show. None of the five previous “Top Models” have gone on to do a damn thing worth noticing. But that’s another story.

Tyra, that queen beeyatch that we all love to watch as she stomps down the fashion runway half nekkid, told Kathy straight up. It came down to Kathy and Faronda (sp?) as the catty judges eyed the results of the critical fashion shoot. The girls all donned bald caps, glued some sequins to their cheeks, then crouched down and posed with other mannequin heads, ala E.T. hiding in the closet with the stuffed animals.

To the judges, Kathy’s photo gave no eyes. No connectionn with the eyes. They also didn’t like her syrupy Southern accent, which I’ll admit was heavy (the girl’s from Transylvania County, a 2003 graduate of Rosman High, for goodness sakes – cut her some slack), and her posture was horrible. This girl didn’t stand a chance.

Tyra: “Stand up straight.”
Cut to Kathy, straightening.
Tyra: “Chin up”
Cut to Kathy, jutting chin.
Tyra: “Shoulders back.”
Cut to Kathy, who flicks her shoulders back briefly, then returns to the slouch.
Tyra: “There she is! There’s the supermodel! Oh, she’s gone…”

So it came down to Kathy and Faronda – Faronda, who thought she was all that. Faronda, who has miles of potential, but had the worst photo in the judges eyes. Tyra asked the two if they should go with the girl with the worst photo but potential, or the girl with no potential but who’s likeable.

They’ll always go with potential.

WLOSer Larry Blunt got up in his pulpit, as he is won’t to do, and preached to us a little after “reporting” to us that Kathy got the boot. “Maybe she’ll see that this is a blessing in disguise,” Larry told us. “That’s a very phony world.”

Yeah, Larry. You remember that the next time you slap on the pancake and stick every hair in place for the lights and cameras. A very real world you’re living in, buddy.

The only good thing about Kathy losing is that now the Hendersonville newspaper can get off this non-story. The newspaper has been following this as if it’s somehow important. The story is actually atop the newspapers web site this morning.

The paper’s last story in advance of the Top Model premiere, which quotes “web searches,” press releases and yet another America’s Next Top Model contest from our area (Amanda Swafford), urged us to watch by giving us critical information like this:

“Hoxit’s bio on the show’s Web site, lists the 5’9” blonde’s hometown as Brevard and said she works as a house painter. Her favorite food is chicken Caesar salad and her favorite TV show is “America’s Next Top Model.”

“An Internet search found that Hoxit is in a relationship and that she attended the University of North Carolina — Charlotte during the 2003-04 school year; she was pursuing a bachelor’s degree in medicine with a minor in chemistry.”

And here’s an insightful quote from the former Top Model contestant sizing up Kathy’s chances:

“I think she has a really interesting look and really pretty eyes,” Swafford said.

Wowza. This girl’s going places. As the newspaper tells us: “The mother of 4-year-old Elijah is living in Asheville where she has been writing a children’s book and hopes to finish filming two roles in the independent film Asheville: The Movie later this spring.”